Did your baby sleep? Mine either. Not unless he was in my arms, in a wrap on my chest or had my boob in his mouth. Which meant long nights. Long nights of up and down to nurse and then settle him back to sleep on his back in the bassinet right next to our bed. (You know, the safe way) It meant my husband heard every little movement we made in the night. It meant my newborn almost fully woke up before I could get him latched to the boob and nurse him back to dreamland. Those first few weeks are blurry...as I'm sure they are for most new first time moms. But, breastfeeding was numero uno on my priority list so stubborn me was determined to make sure it worked. By about week three, one morning, after I had nursed for the umpteenth time while my husband snored next to us, I decided to lay my baby next to me in bed. Yes, even after all of the information about how 'unsafe' bedsharing is and about how the most important thing about baby sleep is that its ~alone, on their back, on a flat surface, with no blankets or pillows~ yes I put him in my bed. I removed the blankets, his head was next to my breast with no pillows anywhere close to him and I curled up like a C around him and I learned to nurse laying down! Game. Changer.
My mommy insticts told me that this was good, better even. We could just nurse before either of us had to move or fully wake up and EVERYONE would get more sleep. MORE SLEEP!!
Why is the first damn question everyone needs to ask "How does baby sleep?" As if that's an indication of how good of a mother you are? Can I tell you, it's not. Babies aren't supposed to sleep through the night. Babies are biologically programmed to wake up many times a night. It's normal. How often your baby wakes up is in no way an indication of something you're doing right or wrong. Breastfed babies wake up more often because breastmilk is digested in about 30 minutes....it's good stuff but 30 minutes? Really? Shit.
So. You need to worry about your baby and your family and no one else. You need to do what works for you in your house and (parden my french) fuck what everyone else says about where and how you and your baby sleep.
Bedsharing can be done safely. It has been done by cultures around the world for centuries. As long as you plan to bedshare and you aren't doing it out of pure exhaustion in the middle of the night when you're tired and frustrated and not thinking clearly. As long as you make your bed a safe place with no pillows or blankets near baby, a firm mattress with no fluffy featherbed toppers and you are not under the influence of any alcohol or drugs (prescription or otherwise), bedsharing is quite safe. A mother and her baby are extremely in tune with each other. You might not completely wake up every time your baby fusses but you know about it. You'd know about it if they were in a bassinet or in another room completely or away on a sleepover in ten years. You're a mom now. You just know. Babies should be close to their mothers, within arms reach for at least the first six months of their lives. Asleep, on their backs, on a firm surface with no pillows or blankets around them. It is the safest way to prevent SIDS. Whether you choose a bed of their own in your room or in your bed, as long as it's practiced safely, is nobody's business but yours and your baby's.